The Conductor as Yogi: Letting Go

“Letting go” is hardly a surprising topic for a yoga blog.  But for the conductor?  Now there’s an interesting exploration.

Letting go is central to yoga and other wisdom practices.  We sit on the mat and focus on our breathing, letting go with each exhale.  We consider the words of poets and sages, of scripture and of mentors, each in their own way teaching us the wisdom of letting go if we want to live our best life.

When I first encountered the foundational yoga principle of vairagya (“non-attachment” or literally, “without color”), I have to admit I was skeptical.  I couldn’t imagine being non-attached or dispassionate about anything in life, especially my teaching and conducting.  Isn’t our passion as an artist/teacher our greatest strength?

Vairagya is best understood in relation to abhyasa, consistent practice.  We know all about practice, about coming back to the music every day, improving our skill and understanding and teaching singers to do the same.  But vairagya teaches us to let go of the outcome of that work, to detach from the ultimate result and the judgment (or perceived judgment) of what we do.  For conductors, this is perhaps our ultimate personal challenge.

Performers can fall into the trap of attaching what we do to who we are. This sets up the false equation of good performance=good person (and its unhealthy opposite).  As conductors, we are performers, and we also carry the role of leader and teacher, which can compound our attachment to outcome by adding a heavy sense of responsibility for the performance of others.  No wonder we find it hard to let go.

Letting go of the outcome of our work does not mean we don’t care about it or that we don’t use our reflective awareness to inform our path forward.  This is the very process of making art—doing the work, reflecting on it, and then returning to the work with new insight and approaches. The bumps along the way, the surprises, the disappointments, are what makes the process revealing and ultimately, meaningful.  This is the lifecycle of the artist—of the human—and when we understand and internalize this, we can begin to practice healthy letting go, the prerequisite for our best work and best life.

“Every desire brings its own color to the mind. The moment you color the mind, a ripple is formed—just as when a stone is thrown into a calm lake, it creates waves in the water. When the mind is tossed by these desires one after the other, there won’t be peace or rest in the mind.  And with a restless mind you can’t have steady practice. When you want to do something constantly, your mind should not be distracted by other desires. That’s why this sort of dispassion or non-attachment must always go with the practice. Any practice without this non-attachment can never be fulfilled.”

The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali, 1.15

The desire to improve sound or clarify understanding is part of our musical “practice.”  But the desires based in fear or judgement cloud the mind and pull us away from our musical mission.  Letting go of what we don’t need allows the creative process to unleash itself.  Letting go gives us breathing room, to see what we could not see when other emotions were blinding us—room for the rest of our life, the work-life balance we are all hoping for. Letting go of outcomes reminds us we are not what we do; we are more than the sum total of our stuff, even our creative “stuff,” our performances or accomplishments.  And letting go is the only way we can fully, selflessly serve others.

“So, when the mind is free from personal interest, we do our work well and feel joyful.  Our lives become meaningful.”

What could you let go of this week that might actually lead you closer to your joy?  Prepare to be surprised.

Dr. Ramona Wis is the Mimi Rolland Endowed Professor in the Fine Arts, Professor of Music, and Director of Choral Activities at North Central College in Naperville, Illinois and the author of The Conductor as Leader:  Principles of Leadership Applied to Life on the Podium.  Dr. Wis is a 500-hour CYT (Certified Yoga Teacher) and a certified Brain Longevity® Specialist, a research-based certification on yoga and integrative medicine for brain health and healthy aging. Reach her at: 

 Check out: The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali
https://www.amazon.com/dp/1938477073/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_8TQDFWYN46FPD2YTY31S