Choral Ethics: Being True To Yourself

“To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.” William Shakespeare

A few weeks ago, I wrote a blog about the scandal (no need to repeat it again) at the New York Philharmonic. I asked for comments and opinions. No one did ON CHORALNET, but plenty of folks contacted me via email. The floodgates opened and I was both amazed and humbled, so if I haven’t responded to you, it’s because I’ve been overwhelmed. There were emails from across the country, strangers, and friends, telling me I am doing important work, congratulating me about blogging about things that NEED TO BE SAID during this time.

Some of my correspondents also shared their own stories, or their friends’ stories, or stories from their conservatory days. We in the Choral World have our own villains and our own scandals, the orchestra and band and instrumental worlds do not have a monopoly on Music Folk Behaving Badly. We are afraid to out the Bad Guys, but maybe we shouldn’t be afraid. Instead, perhaps we should endeavor to change the climate that has created these situations.

There was an opinion piece in the New York Times last week by the medical ethicist, Carl Elliot. He wrote about how certain behaviors are accepted in the medical community that would not be accepted in the rest of society. Done in the name of medicine and medical science, anything goes when it’s for “the good of medicine.”

The same can be said in our profession. If it’s for “the good of music,” it seems to be a good excuse for people to do bad things. I have many questions on this subject. If it is truly about “the music,” shouldn’t it also be about the PEOPLE making the music? Do we stand idlily by while we watch friends and colleagues abused, maligned, ignored, or bullied by those in power? Should we continue to have to warn young women and young men NOT TO EVER be alone with a certain professor? Should we accept having to “jump through hoops” for a director who seems to get some sort of perverse joy in watching us do so? If we know about a conductor’s sordid past, shouldn’t we tell someone who is thinking about hiring them?

Our excuse for doing nothing is we don’t want to get involved, or don’t want to rock the boat, so we allow the status quo to continue. That’s on us; if we don’t TELL someone or ALLOW someone to continue their bad behavior as we observe, it may not have anything to do with us NOW. The next time, it could be us or our daughters or sons or someone we care about that it’s happening to. It’s difficult to speak up if IT’S HAPPENING TO YOU (and I speak from experience) but if you SEE SOMETHING, SAY SOMETHING. Reach out to friends if you see them being abused or mistreated, then believe what they tell you. Speak up, if you see someone abusing their power, or at least speak to someone who could help defuse the situation. Don’t hire someone who may be a wonderful musician, if you know they are a despicable human being. Until someone does SOMETHING and changes their own behavior, there will continue to be stories in the news about the latest Classical Music Scandal.

I have often mentioned through the eight and a half years I have been blogging here at ChoralNet, many of my correspondents with Choral Ethics Dilemmas want to know what the “right thing” to do is. Most of the time, THEY KNOW what the right thing is, they just want to have their feelings validated. I often share their stories (I change names and other details not affecting their stories for privacy) but not always because what they tell me is too difficult. I try to help them sort out their feelings so they can find a solution that will be best for them. Remember PEOPLE are the ones making the music, so what’s good for the PEOPLE will be good for the MUSIC.