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Choral Potpourri/Choral Ethics: Our Own Worst Enemy

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“Always forgive your enemies – nothing annoys them so much.” Oscar Wilde

Manda* tells me she can’t believe, in the 21st century, this happened to her. She thought she had moved on and now is faced with an uncomfortable dilemma. Here is her story; she asked my advice, and I gave it. What would you have told her to do?

Five years ago, Manda applied for a very nice community chorus position. It was a bigger job than you would have thought, with a children’s chorus, a youth chorus, a chamber chorus as well as the larger adult chorus under the organizational umbrella. She and her family had moved into the area and one of her new neighbors had mentioned the job opening.

The artistic director supervised the children and youth choruses and directed the chamber and the larger chorus. There was an executive director, but that person handled the administration side, not the artistic. Manda was more than qualified to supervise the children and youth choruses, having taught Kindergarten through 12th grade music in her former community and as well as directed the local community chorus. It was more like a three-quarter time position than a full time. Having just moved across the country, it would have been perfect as her family adjusted to a completely new part of the country and she worked getting her teaching certification for that state.

She went into the interview hopeful; confident her skills and experience would help getting her to the audition phrase of the process. The Search Committee seemed impressed, and she was “handed off” to the directors of the children and youth choruses for an interview with both of them. Since she would be supervising, it was thought they should have a say. Both were lovely young women and they all got along well. Then she was “handed off” to do a sample rehearsal of the chamber chorus, which she felt went well. Most of the singers were excited for her to do the sample rehearsal of the larger chorus and told her so.

Manda didn’t realize it was to be a group audition of all three of the artistic director candidates. She was the only woman and the oldest. Each candidate was expected to do a short warm-up and rehearse one assigned section of the same large work. When not directing, they were asked to sing in their own vocal section. Manda would be last and sang in the soprano section while the others rehearsed. Unlike the tenor and bass sections, the sopranos were not exactly welcoming. She sucked it up, smiled and sang.

When it was her turn to rehearse, she was business-like but relaxed. Her section of the piece was quickly learned and with time still allotted, was asked by a member of the Search Committee to go over a passage one of her fellow candidates was not able to perfect. With a few adjustments to what was already accomplished, she got them to do it, with time to spare.

Three weeks later, Manda had heard nothing, so she checked the organization’s website—the tenor had gotten the position, but no one had told her! She wasn’t happy but moved on which meant taking a few courses to get her teaching certificate while she subbed.

Several months passed and Manda subbed for a high school band director. She was surprised the director of the youth chorus, Gennifer*, was the choral director at the high school. She wasn’t sure how she should act but needn’t have worried because Gennifer came over to her and apologized. Then asked to have lunch with Manda that Saturday because it was important.

Gennifer told Manda both she and Deana*, the children’s director, had voted for her but the Search Committee was adamant the new director would be one of the men. Why? Because many of the older women members of the larger group didn’t think a woman would be taken seriously or respected as artistic director. In fact, EVERYONE, even those who thought they needed a male director, thought Manda was the better fit for their group. But their worries about being respected and taken seriously overrode the actual ABILITY to do the job.

All this brings us to the present. Manda was contacted a few weeks ago by the Executive Director of the choral organization to ask if she would consider taking the position of artistic director, and no interviews or auditions would be needed. With the Pandemic, only Zoom rehearsals and just the stress of it all, the person they had hired five years ago quit in a huff. Manda was given several weeks to make her decision and she is (as I write this blog) undecided.

When Manda contacted me, after I asked WHY IN THE WORLD the Search Committee thought a GROUP AUDITION was a good idea, I asked other questions. I asked if she would take the job if she hadn’t known why she wasn’t chosen. She said yes. I asked if she thought she could help the organization through the Pandemic transition and she said yes. I asked if her feelings about those older women would color how she viewed the position, her answer was also yes and that’s the dilemma.

Here was my advice; if Manda would really like the job, she should take it. If trying to get past knowing what she knows would be too difficult, she shouldn’t.

As women conductors and classical musicians, it’s always a struggle to be taken seriously. We hope other women would appreciate that and be supportive, but often, that’s not the case. We need to lift each other up, not pull each other down. And I told Manda exactly that; we must lift each other up. So how could she lift those women up?

What advice would you give Manda?

Until next week, be well and safe!

*Name Withheld

I am taking my Choral Ethics Blogs to my chamber choir’s Facebook page for the foreseeable future. Please join me there this morning! https://www.facebook.com/themidwestmotetsociety/

Choral Potpourri/Choral Ethics: Shades of Black

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“There are certain shades of limelight that can wreck a girl’s complexion.” Audrey Hepburn

In case you are wondering, today’s blog has nothing to do with the Rolling Stone’s “Paint It Black;” nothing whatsoever. It wasn’t until I was typing the title out that the Rolling Stones connection came to me. And speaking of the Rolling Stones; they have it easy as far as what they wear when they perform, which is really what today’s blog is about.

Like many groups in the early to mid-1960s, the Rolling Stones wore matching suits, thin neckties and the same haircut. As the world of Rock’n’Roll matured, how they dressed to reflect trends, and possibly, start trends, evolved. Anything they wore was fine because they were Rock Stars, and they were men, and everyone encouraged them to be who they are.

Concert attire shows the audience what to expect. Most Rock Stars (I’m including all “popular” musicians, no matter their genre) wear what reflects their music, what image they would like to project, and what is comfortable enough to do what they need to do. Classical musicians (except solo singers singing in Classical concerts) wear attire that should not distract from the music they are playing or conducting. Male Classical Musicians need not worry about being taken seriously but female and non-binary musicians NEED TO and there’s the dilemma.

Male musicians, be they classical or rock or hip-hop or anything else, have always had it much easier than their female counterparts in choosing concert wear. They are allowed to be themselves. Those who are more “serious” musicians may wear the standard uniform of a tux or tails, and not have to think further about it. Or if a concert is a bit more casual, they may wear a business suit or a white shirt and a tie or a black shirt and black pants and be done with it. Some male conductors mix it up a bit with different types of collars or perhaps the cut of a jacket, but essentially, it’s usually black and pretty simple.

Female musicians, be THEY classical or rock or hip-hop or anything else, have a much more challenging time choosing concert attire so they may be taken seriously. Nothing too low-cut or high-cut or too tight or too loose or too bright of a color or too dull of a color or too much fabric or too little fabric or backless. Female musicians who are rockers or hip-hoppers or sing pop ballads usually are careful about what they wear but have a bit more leeway than their Classical Sisters. Many decide to do what they like and are either embraced or criticized; their male counterparts need not worry.

Rock Stars who are non-binary probably have an easier time than non-binary Classical Musicians. Classical Musicians of all genders must dress so as to not distract from the music. There is a standard “concert black” which many not needing to wear a tuxedo or tails embrace, as do I, but it’s a bit more complicated.

Like many folks during the Pandemic, I’ve been clearing out my closet. One day it struck me how many items of black clothing I own: tops, bottoms (pants and skirts and palazzo pants) for summer, winter, spring and fall. Some things are only to sing in and some things only to conduct in and some things I could do either. I have heavy velvets and light chiffons and a couple of tops, depending on the weather, I wear with black jeans when I stage-manage. I have things to be worn when we perform outside and it’s hot and others I can wear outside if it’s chilly. I have black dresses I can conduct in as well as a long brocade tunic, worn with flowy pants, which is one of my favorite things to wear for fall concerts. I have a good number of white tops and a dress with a white top and black bottom in the event that color combo is called for. I also have a woman’s tuxedo jacket, which is very uncomfortable to conduct in, but looks great; I save that for headshots! I didn’t mention shoes, both flats and slight heels, which I am careful to choose for the concert, time of year and comfort level. I NEED all these options. In order to look appropriate, I need to reflect the time of year, and my own comfort, when I choose what I should wear.

As a woman conductor, I have many options to choose from in the Black section of my closet but there are times I wish I didn’t need to have so many. I wish we all could just get on with the music.

Until next week, be well and safe!

I have been taking my Choral Ethics Blogs to my chamber choir’s Facebook page but am not able to this morning. See you next week!

Choral Potpourri/Choral Ethics: The Rule of Three

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“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.” Robert Frost

I follow the blogs of several authors. A while back, one of them wrote about trying to accomplish three things every day. They could be big things or small things, but if she completed three, she considered her day a success. Early in the Pandemic, getting out of bed, showering, and getting dressed qualified. As the Pandemic progressed, she did more normal tasks until her life was almost the way it had been before.

I am a person who has to be busy, ticking off chores large and small, in many parts of my life. When the Pandemic hit, I was flummoxed as to what was important to accomplish because what normally was important didn’t seem so much now. I struggled; should I work on repertoire? Re-invent my chamber choir online? Try to keep relevant to our local art scene, despite the fact NO ONE else in our local art scene was? Since I couldn’t do much with my chamber choir, should I concentrate on the Homefront?

The answers to my own questions were mixed but, after weeks of uncertainty, I decided to take one day at a time. That helped me feel a bit better. It wasn’t until I read that author’s blog, I realized I was doing, instinctively, what she had decided to do to help herself through the Pandemic.

Some days, I had been doing unpleasant things, such as cleaning a bathroom, answering emails with difficult replies and returning phone calls–three things. Another day, I might do the grocery shopping (an ordeal, with masking and in-store shopper limits), call my Dad and do a load of laundry—three things. I baked cranberry bread and sent out my chamber choir weekly email and texted a friend—three things. It evolved to me doing certain things on certain days of the week but usually, three things. There was a rhythm to the days, just like Before Times, which comforted me.

And after reading her blog, I thought it interesting to limit it to accomplishing three things because there are days when I seem to get “so much done.” And then there are days when three is really pushing it. I wondered; why choose a particular number of tasks to complete each day? Getting one thing completed, especially if it’s a “big thing” or an “unpleasant thing,” can make you feel good, but more than one or two things accomplished every day, and you feel even better.  It is easier to be successful if we ALREADY see ourselves as successful! We feel good, and good about ourselves, when we get stuff done. If we are able to finish three different things, especially during a difficult time, it feels good and that’s part of feeling successful.

I am preparing for my long-anticipated chamber choir summer retreat, with auditions starting a month before. Music needs to be collated, handouts and language sheets need to be collected and folders need to be organized before the retreat. I need to post auditions, do a snail mailing, and update our website; busy, but necessary work. Normally, I would be stressed out even though most of those tasks can be accomplished over a period of weeks. Using the Rule of Three, I am making a list of tasks to be done and assigning one or two of them per day over several weeks, the more time-sensitive ones to be done first. And I feel less stressed.

As we head toward more “normal” in our lives, there are several Pandemic ideas I am taking with me, several habits and outlooks which I believe will help me get back to my normal. One of them is the Rule of Three. It goes without saying, my new cranberry bread recipe is another!

What things have you learned during this time that you will continue to use when things are back to normal?

Until next week, be well and safe!

I have been taking my Choral Ethics Blogs to my chamber choir’s Facebook page but am not able to this morning. *See* you next week!

Choral Potpourri/Choral Ethics: Storytime Two

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“What is success? To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate the beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded!” Ralph Waldo Emerson
 
It is Storytime here at Choral Potpourri/Choral Ethics with a story from my own life and career. I hope it will get you thinking about how you view your own successes, be they large or small.
 
I’ve often thought about Cassie* in the last few years, one of my singers in the community children’s chorus I directed for ten years. Working with her changed my attitude about many things. Because of her I consider myself a success, no matter what I did before or after meeting her.
 
This community children chorus was part of a local parks and recreation district’s fine arts program. We were one of several performing arts groups, which included an adult chorus, community band, and a theater troupe. Occasionally, we would sing with the adult groups but mostly, we were left on our own.
 
I had the pleasure of developing a nice program for children 5 to ten years old, including a two-week summer choir day camp. In the beginning, we had only five kids signed up because we chose the “wrong day” for rehearsals. That’s the day of the week when everyone has their swimming or religion classes or soccer games. Changing rehearsal day for the second session made all the difference as well as maintaining similar concert dates every time.
 
There were times we had an older group and there were times we had a younger group. Most often, we had a mixture of ages with many of the older kids “repeaters” and the younger ones quick enough to catch right up. I loved those kids. I loved that job, until I didn’t.
 
It started when the supervisor who helped me develop the choral program left. I still don’t know why and, though I see her several times a year at community arts events, she’s never said. The fellow who took over was nice enough but didn’t have the same devotion toward the children’s chorus as his predecessor.
 
As soon as he started, instead of a per course salary, I was expected to turn in a time sheet. The “Powers That Be” believed the only work I did for the chorus was a 90-minute rehearsal every week, then a 60-minute concert at the end of the session. When I complained about doing busy work, my new boss told to record EVERYTHING, and I did. I recorded EVERYTHING, as my boss had suggested but THAT was time consuming too. I was paid more for that particular session than the previous ones and then was told I no longer had to record my hours.
 
One summer, after choir day camp, I decided I had had enough. The adult chorus director didn’t want our music stored with theirs. The new, state of the art facility where the park district wanted us to practice had a lousy secondhand piano which was never tuned, despite my requests. The parents of some the younger children wanted us to sing more contemporary music—think Brittney Spears. And the Stage Mothers had been AWFUL during day camp. I had already done preparation for the upcoming fall and spring sessions and decided I would turn in my resignation after the spring concert.
 
A week before rehearsals began, my boss asked me to call a parent who had a 4-year-old child who wanted to sing with us. I told him I wasn’t sure that was a good idea because she was probably too young. But I called as requested and the Mom told me her 4-year-old loved to sing and had a rare form of pediatric liver cancer. Cassie was in remission and Mom had promised her she could sing in a choir. I agreed to take her on but wasn’t sure it would work.
 
Cassie was ADORABLE! Bald from chemo, she had a wardrobe of cute hats and a bubbly personality. The older girls in the chorus fell in love with her and I had to make up a rotating schedule for them to sit next to her in rehearsal. She had the sweetest voice and LOVED “The Turkey Song,” arranged by Ruth Crawford Seeger. And she could sing, boy could she SING! She attended every rehearsal but was too ill to perform in our concert. The older girls were devastated. My boss told me after the concert, she had had a setback.
 
The spring session began with one of the fathers trying to bully me into changing the concert date because they were going out of the country and his daughter wouldn’t be able to sing. He threatened to talk to my boss because I wasn’t being cooperative. My boss did stick up for me, but I felt good with my decision to resign.
 
Things went along as I had thought they would that spring. Right after our concert, my boss asked me to collect some of my mail before he went on vacation. Along with the usual music catalogues, there was a greeting card waiting for me. I opened it up in front of him and immediately sank down; it was a “thank-you” note from Cassie’s Mom, thanking me for making the last few months of her life so happy. I cried and, when he read it, so did my boss.
 
Cassie had entered the hospital right around the time of our fall concert and had been there ever since, until her death a few weeks before. She loved the “Turkey Song,” and had taught it to every one of her nurses and her doctors. They would sing it when they saw her. Her Mom told me, when she could no longer talk, she still tried to sing that song. The last sounds she ever made were that damn, silly song.
 
I’m not crying, YOU’RE CRYING!
 
I still resigned.
 
Until next week, be well and be safe!
 
*Name Withheld

I am taking my Choral Ethics Blogs to my chamber choir’s Facebook page for the foreseeable future. Please join me there this morning! https://www.facebook.com/themidwestmotetsociety/

Choral Potpourri/Choral Ethics: Storytime One

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“A story should have a beginning, a middle and an end, but not necessarily in that order.” Jean-Luc Godard

It is Storytime here at Choral Potpourri/Choral Ethics with a story from my own life and career. I hope it will get you thinking about how you treat those you work for and with, in the future.

It was one of those days, one in which I had many little things to accomplish. Nothing big or especially time consuming, but just a lot of teensy chores. Little details needed to be addressed in many aspects of my life and I felt stressed to get them all done before rehearsal that night. But I did.

I was directing a decent church choir in a medium-sized church and always planned my rehearsals the afternoon before and sometimes, the afternoon of the day before. This rehearsal (because I knew I would be busy), I had done my planning the day before. I listed the announcements I needed to make about several upcoming services in my planning so I would not forget anything. I felt confident I had ticked off all the boxes and it flowed well, or so I thought.

The next morning, I got a message from my supervising clergy to come in for a meeting to discuss something important. I was confused about what could be so important she needed to call a special meeting, and came in as requested. It turns out, the accompanist/organist felt I didn’t go into as much detail about those upcoming services as I should have and told the pastor. Instead of elaborating himself when I made the announcements or taking me aside after rehearsal, he tattled on me. I explained to the pastor what I said, and even happened to have my rehearsal plan in my briefcase to show her. She didn’t seem to think what I said was exactly wrong, just not enough. I felt pretty crummy about the whole thing. This incident was not what finally caused me to resign from a job I loved, but it was a contributing factor.

The accompanist/organist was young, and this was his first church job. He was a good musician but young, inexperienced and got flustered with all the service music. I finally helped him stay “in the service” by using sticky notes with numbers on them to keep him from being confused on what to play, when. When he was late to rehearsals (which was often), I covered for him and played myself until he got there. There were several times he was late to a Sunday warm-up, and we worried he wouldn’t show at all. Again, I covered for him until I couldn’t one Sunday because he missed his Prelude. He believed I tattled on him, but I did not. And that’s why he tattled on me about something so insignificant.

I should have gone to the Personnel committee about his tardiness from the beginning. Several members of my choir were on that committee, and one person’s spouse was, so it was not exactly a secret. I’ve always believed we should “pick our battles” and his occasional lateness never bothered me. But missing his Prelude could not be overlooked.  I was HIS supervisor, since I was a senior staff member, and was not tattling by mentioning it to the pastor. When she wondered where he was, I told her he had not yet gotten to church, and she was NOT happy. He walked in five minutes after that, and was a bit ticked we skipped over his Prelude since it would make everything else late if he played it.

Looking back, I probably should have said more about those services in my announcements that evening. If that young, inexperienced accompanist/organist had spoken up or had taken me aside after, I would have been fine with it. No good deed goes unpunished.

Until next week, be well and be safe!

I am taking my Choral Ethics Blogs to my chamber choir’s Facebook page for the foreseeable future. Please join me there this morning! https://www.facebook.com/themidwestmotetsociety/

Choral Potpourri/Choral Ethics: Father’s Day Ruminations

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“You don’t have to deserve your mother’s love. You have to deserve your father’s.” Robert Frost

As I write today’s blog, I am sipping a glass of iced tea, brewed with mint from my own garden. The mint was the first thing we planted when we bought our house 27 years ago, but we should have planted it in a pot in the ground. I learned my lesson because it has spread and spread and SPREAD. Every year, we pull the mint that invades our roses and phlox, remarking on the fresh, clean smell as we do. But I don’t mind because this mint has survived to grow another year, as it has every year, since it was in my Great-Grandfather’s Garden in Kansas. It is a yearly reminder of my ancestors from that branch of the family.

Our mint has made a few stops between Kansas and the south suburbs of Chicago. My Mom gave me a few cuttings from her garden in Chicago when we bought our house, so our mint was in Chicago before coming home with me. And my Grandmother gave Mom and Dad a few plants from HER garden in Berwyn when they bought the house where we were brought up. My Grandfather had planted our mint in his Berwyn Victory Garden during the Second World War after a visit to HIS parent’s farm in Kansas. And I recently gave a cutting to one of my sons to grow in a pot on a windowsill in his Chicago apartment, so our mint is back in Chicago, the fifth generation to grow it. It’s funny to think; a cutting or two from an herb in a garden in the middle of the last century is thriving in a different place and time and yet, it is. I don’t know where the mint came from before its Kansas origins, probably from a friend’s cuttings or who knows where, but it has survived.

Have you ever thought about this; we are music and choral survivors from another place and time, a line continued down through us. All of those “teachers of our teachers,” continued through us. We bring our musical ancestors with us, whether we realize it or not, to everything we do. Our rehearsal techniques, even if we supposedly use “new” methods, reflect one or two or three of the choral directors we’ve worked with from elementary school through graduate school. Musical tastes and attitudes often reflect our musical ancestors; the willingness to try new things or to stick with what we know. A way we phrase a correction or try to get a certain vowel sound or dynamic is probably similar to the way we were taught and directed in those formative rehearsals in our past.

Even the way we DON’T do things reflects those teachers of ours. Many a ChoralNetter complaint has come to me about directors being mean and nasty when there was no need to be mean and nasty. Depending on the circumstance, I’ve suggested they just deal with the nonsense for now, then move on when it makes sense or to leave the organization and explain why. I’ve often told them to think about how they treat, or would like to treat, their own singers and students. I ask them to think about how they feel in a typical rehearse with that nasty director. We can look at what we didn’t like in our teachers and do the opposite; and it’s probably for the best. My own ballet teacher, Walter Camryn, used to say, “everyone’s good for something, if only to be a bad example.”

I thought about some of my singing and choral ancestors, the teachers of my teachers. Several of my teachers were students of Madeline Marshall and two were students of Leo Sowerby (including my own mother). I’ve studied with students of Robert Shaw and Margaret Hillis. I know my rehearsal and performance techniques are a result of all those that came before me, a sort of mash-up of what they did and how they did it. What I do today is not exactly what they did, but an essence of what they did, brought into the 21st century. The same can probably be said of YOU!

This Sunday is Father’s Day and while we honor the fathers in our lives, it might be important to remember and honor teachers and mentors and those we consider our musical parents. While the Pandemic ebbs away, thinking about our teachers and mentors can help us all feel good during this strange time.

Until next week, be well and be safe!

I am taking my Choral Ethics Blogs to my chamber choir’s Facebook page for the foreseeable future. Please join me there this morning! https://www.facebook.com/themidwestmotetsociety/

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