CJ Replay: Relationships and the Choral Conductor
Date: December 12, 2013
(An excerpt from the Choral Journal article, “Prickly Puzzles and Daunting Dilemmas: Facing Fate, Fear, and Family, Part 2,” by Suzanne M. Pence.)
Single is easier and far less complicated when starting a career. Your time is your own, and there are fewer distractions on developing a choral program. However, relationships are a beautiful part of life and need not be neglected due to a demanding career. The following is offered as food for thought regarding relationship and career:
First, relationships must be healthy. Whether single or married, the manner in which one cultivates and nurture relationships will determine much of lifelong happiness. Healthy relationships include the following building blocks: support and understanding, open and honestcommunication, ordering combined goals, budgeting time based on priorities, taking care of yourself and each other, and surrounding oneself with positive people. Several of these items deserve additional comment.
Priorities. This task must evolve from a balance between career goals, partner's career goals, and life goals as partners. When goals have been discussed in all areas of life together, one will be more able to formulate a realistic timeline in which these goals may be achieved. Decisions about children, changing jobs, going back to school, etc., can be made with far less stress if discussed before these issues arise. Goals and priorities may change throughout life together, but the key is honest communication and support through these changes.